Three little mice stood up on the wall…
Who is the fairest of them all ?
Or who is the most Right one of them all ?
The competition is intense to prove who is the right man and/or who is the right party in modern British politics.
Cameron, Clegg and Brown are the three little mice of the never ending tale.
Three little leaders of three little parties who compete in a beauty pageant to be right.
Politics of economic security and right wing tidal streams of unimaginative bloody rehashed righty pea soup…
Competing to outmaneuver each other to prove to the largely indifferent voters how they will shift their world to the right of UKIP… and steal the thunder of BNP and the bird brains.
What are these midgets thinking?
Doom and Gloom for us now. As it is for us that this wretched tale of seeking balanced politics in today’s permanent right shift gets to be made into a beauty pageant for our entertainment.
Like a red tide that kills everything in it’s path and is unhealthy to even enter the water – this algae bloom of mentally polluting right politics is the current British electoral lack of choice. It kills political innovation and modern Polity.
With No philosophical underpinnings the three candidates all speak about continuing the war in Afghanistan as a fig leaf for the illegal war in Iraq – for which none wants to seek redress and justice either.
Then they will have a boring debate between the three spokespersons. For these are mere speakers with out enough social leadership skills to be allowed to even talk the dog safely across the street…
A televised debate to reach the uninterested voters and convince them who looks the best. For in the end the debates are far more about how the candidates look rather that about their grasp of the issues or their leadership skills. Somehow the beauty pageant of politicos is a boon for TV just as much as American idol for a different segment of the population. The ones who bother to go vote in the polls and rather enjoy the X factor or strictly come dancing or whatever the TV cat will drag on to their screens.
So this is push politics. If people aren’t interested, well then let’s serve them the same fare that the TV pundits offer. Let’s push onto their TV trays some political junk to eat with their crisps, sausage and beer. Consuption politics aren’t really sustainable for Democracy but are clearly the flavour of the month.
Who is advising these morons? A famous mice popularity advisor? Could be…
For starters, a three way debate isn’t a debate – it’s a beauty pageant. No two ways about it.
Have you tried to put together three boxers in a ring? It will not be a fight – it will be an orgy.
Pugilists know that well – and even cage fighters love to draw attention to the fact that there is only one man coming out ‘alive’.
Yes putting three little mice in bed together to talk dirty under a TV camera is a new sport. No more the couple’s fight. This is a three way fight that Democratic politics is the way to choose who looks better and is able to enunciate their party’s almost identical policies with enough flourish to make them look a bit more different.
You’ve seen a beauty in a bikini – You’ve seen them all. Or maybe not…. depending if you like blondes or brunettes or exotic – please don’t let me go on.
But politics should be a boxing match. Bleeding and bruised the best man walks away from the canvas – alive. He who comes out with his head held high – is the winner.
But putting all three together is admittedly more entertaining as Woody Allen likes to say, and a bit too American but still an orgy. Put more than two people in bed together and can’t tell anymore who done the fucking…
You get my drift…
A constant accident in the making is the byline of this TV debates portraying modern British politics. What the esteemed party leaders fail to notice is they aren’t a bigger entertainment draw than Subo.
Subo trumps party leader debates – Think about that. Maybe she will make the labour party fortunes turn. She kinda looks like Gordon too no? Maybe they can substitute for the debates. She will carry a tune far better, longer and more pleasant than Brown can ever hope to. Albeit the Scottish temper both have is a twin problem…
Still Subo is the only hope to make me watch the debates and maybe the only hope, Labour has to come out of this alive and kicking…
In detail this is how the three parties describe their adventures in TV land beauty pageants and pushy politic orgies:
Gordon Brown, David Cameron and Nick Clegg are to go head-to-head in Britain’s first live prime ministerial TV debates as part of next year’s general election campaign, following an agreement announced between broadcasters and the three main political parties.
To understand how far down the slide of British politics has been – the parties and the main TV channels have been negotiating on the format of the debates for months, but they finally announced they had reached an agreement on the details and format they will take.
It has been agreed that three programmes will be broadcast in peak time in front of studio audiences. Each will be between 85 and 90 minutes long. About half of each debate will be themed.
ITV is to stage the first debate, which will be presented by Alastair Stewart. Sky will produce the second debate presented by Adam Boulton, and David Dimbleby will present the final programme on the BBC. It has yet to be decided whether questions will be posed by presenters or members of the public in the audience. The format excludes Channel Four and parties such as the Greens, Ukip and nationalists. Yes the only ones who could have spiced up this show aren’t even invited to the orgy. BNP and UKIP would have been fair game in a beauty pageant. Since it’s a free for all why not get them in?
Even when looking at it seriously, this TV debate decision represents a risk for all of the viewers to become jaded. Further jaded than what they have already become. Cynics and stoic philosophers shall see this as a natural ebullient and faulty emission of polluted brains.
Maybe retrospective thinking and a good night’s sleep led Cameron, the frontrunner, and some senior Tory activists to express fears that he had sent a lifeline to a losing Labour campaign.
Labour had been calling for six debates, claiming the Conservatives wanted only one, but Labour’s chief negotiator, Lord Mandelson, (TV personality turned politician and Lord of everything) agreed to the compromise of three. The Conservatives said they had always been happy with three debates, but had opposed a Labour proposal that the debates start before the election campaign.
Sucks – The bikini contest will not be televised.
Still the leaders’ debates will be staged in the first three weeks of a four-week campaign with no debate held in the week of polling day. It is expected that one debate will focus on foreign affairs, one on the economy and one on public services, but it is possible that the foreign affairs debate will be dropped in favour of another subject if there is insufficient difference between the parties on foreign issues.
The agreement gives Nick Clegg, the Liberal Democrat leader and the least- known of the three party leaders, a chance to shine. Previous plans to stage such debates as in 1997 when the idea was first suggested by then PM John Major, failed mainly over disagreements on whether the Lib Dems should be included in the TV orgy.
Better minds prevailed then. Sadly not now.
Clegg expressed his pleasure tonight, saying: “After a terrible year for politicians because of the expenses scandals, these debates will be an opportunity to start re-engaging people with politics. Just hope ‘the clapped out British politics’ as he describes things – easily could give him the clap and then he would be out of it.
One word of suggestion to Nick: ’Abstinence’.
But Nick enthusiastically goes on to say : “It will become a centrepiece of the general election campaign and provide a new way of doing things.” Yes like the clap it’s a social thing. Fit for the age of social networks.
Nick then called for a new era of candour in Westminster to remove the “despair” people feel about politicians. In his new year’s message, the Liberal Democrat leader said “2010 must be the year we press the political reset button” and tackle the lack of faith in the political system.
Most likely people will press the TIVO button to erase the advertising politics he is so keen to engage in.
Although, the fact that Cameron, a better communicator than either Brown or Clegg, might have most to lose since the Tories are now firmly on the lead – didn’t stop Cameron from saying : “I have been pushing this good thing for two years to happen. I think it can enliven our democracy.”
Same as Cameron pushes all the little people around to do his bidding in an impolite way and is really a ”minnie me” type of politician – He pushes for this too. Maybe he will regret it too. Just hope he brings his stroking cat in the debate to keep him smooth…. At least the cat calls will be easier to explain.
Maybe the only thing that will enliven the British politics is a good ‘cleaning of the clocks’. A thorough cleaning from the discredited and fairly corrupt parliament to the hereditary and arbitrary self serving Lords. But the present PM isn’t doing this and no other candidate is planning to clean the ‘stables of Aegeas’.
PM Brown on the other hand instead of cleaning house – He hopes the nearly four-and-a-half hours of TV debate will give him the chance to show his grasp of the issues. The prime minister is relishing the silly prospect, pointing out that commentators thought his performances in the Commons had improved.
But a major Labour strategist said: “We are not naive. We know that physical appearance, demeanour and how our man looks whilst other candidates talk will be as important to viewers as what he says.” Therefore Brown should be spending the holidays in the Priory in a juice only detox diet with Yoga and Pilates to get him in a good looking younger shape. The man who doesn’t know how to resign…. is going for a makeover.
To show the extent that Labour has taken this as an only Lifeline is this: A complete Labour election campaign team has been flown to the US to talk to Hollywood TV priducers.
I think it might be more important for Brown to restrain his temper if he starts to be asked meaningful questions by the TV audience and he loses it like Subo. That’s where the Priory holidays can be helpful, but for good measure why don’t we give him a stroking cat too?
Maybe if they were to do the ”I am a celebrity Get me out of here” show it will be more fit for the three way free for all insect and creepy crawly eating contest.
Subo in a bikini with the three little mice in thongs and G strings eating disgusting things – is all we can hope for now.
Naturally we boycott this spectacle as unhealthy and unappetizing…
It’s dangerous to watch – We might lose our Libido for … Politics completely.
